Freedom!

This is going to be awkward. How do I explain it? Um...

First, I need you to listen to a few songs to get in the mood. Go look up these songs, youtube them, dig them out of your iTunes library. There are four of them: Freedom 90 by George Michael, We're All Dudes by Less Than Jake, Earthquake by Family Force 5, and Free Falling by Tom Petty.

Done?

Good.

Moving on. Facebook is a funny thing. Remember when women everywhere started posting colors as their status update - men completely oblivious to the purpose that the color posted was the color of the woman's bra? It's like a cyber flash mob.

Then a couple weeks ago, an Iranian cleric (who's name is only slightly easier to pronounce than the Icelandic volcano) stated that scantily dressed women lead young men astray, spreads adultery, and is the reason for earthquakes. Now the first two claims are debatable but they have merit. But that last claim is a whopper. Attractive women in skimpy clothes might case a few car accidents, but earthquakes? Really? Even people who believe that Obama was born in Kenya would call cleric Hockaloogie Shazam a kook. Last I checked (and a fact that even the most uneducated human would admit) cleavage and plate tectonics are two very different sciences.

In protest, a snarky feminist college student started a viral event that spread through facebook and other social media sites. Viola... we have boobquake. The hypothesized formula proven: women - modesty + less clothes than normal does not = earthquake.

Unless you live in a one room cabin miles away from civilization without internet and TV access while growing a unibomber beard, you've probably heard this story. If you are that bearded shack dweller willfully cut off from society, you couldn't possibly be reading this as you do not have access to the web.

I feel I've elaborated on recent history enough. Besides, boobquake was a week ago, so what does this anatomy/geology/theocracy lesson have to do with today?

So far, it's the women who have been able to properly exploit the infectious powers of facebook. When is it the dudes' turn? If there is a boobquake, shouldn't there be a male equivalent? OK, maybe not... but just for the sake of argument, there is such a day. You can read about it HERE.

If you're horrified by what you just read, stop now. Go scrub your brain by watching videos of puppies. Come back tomorrow.

If you're morbidly curious, the answer to your question is 'yes.' Yes, I did. And it was surprisingly comfortable.


p.s., I stopped celebrating and changed before going to the gym. There's no way I'm working out unsupported. There are lines I refuse to cross.

p.p.s. Jennifer McCreight (organizer of boobquake) would probably disagree with me, but modesty isn't a bad thing. While hooker-chic won't cause any earthquakes, it's not appropriate. There is a big difference between being dressed to kill and being dressed to be undressed. Big difference. A tad more modesty could make this a healthier, happier world. Even with non-cleavage induced earthquakes.